It was said, “Our heroes tell alot about us than the heros themselves.” Is that true?
Rabbi Shmuley Boteach in his article said “Michael’s death is not just a personal tragedy, it is an American tragedy. Michael’s story was the stuff” of the American dream.
Below article written by Joseph Mattera
As the tragic events surrounding Michael Jackson’s death on June 25 unfold, we find that it was more related to the tragic events of his life, starting with his childhood.
As we look back we can see that many child stars eventually led tragic adult lives and/or had careers that began to go downhill as they grew older. (For example, Mark Hamill of Star Wars fame, the Olsen twins, Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan to name a few.) In these instances I blame their parents for pursuing fame and fortune for their children at the expense of their emotional health.
1. He lived a duplicitous life
Jackson attempted to carry a public persona of happiness, power, and having his life together while at the same time battling with inner demons that resulted in him paying millions to the parents of a child that accused him of molestation. During one trial it was reported that he actually went to bed regularly with little boys who were staying at his Neverland Ranch.
Because of his money and power, men like Jackson think they can live any way they desire because of an entitlement mentality.
2. He had the need to perform to feel loved and accepted
Jackson had the need to constantly entertain to fill a vast vacuum regarding the need to feel loved and accepted. He made the mistake of equating the adulation and applause of fans for love and acceptance.
These are the words he spoke with Rabbi Shmuley Boteach…
“I am going to say something I have never said before and this is the truth. I have no reason to lie to you and God knows I am telling the truth. I think all my success and fame, and I have wanted it, I have wanted it because I wanted to be loved. That’s all. That’s the real truth. I wanted people to love me, truly love me, because I never really felt loved. I said I know I have an ability. Maybe if I sharpened my craft, maybe people will love me more. I just wanted to be loved, because I think it is very important to be loved and to tell people that you love them and to look in their eyes and say it.”
3. He centered his life on his gifts and abilities instead of solid core values
The Jackson parents started a trend early in his life that continued as a habit-pattern in Jackson’s life, in which everything in his life was driven by his incredible talents and abilities.
4. He ran from his pain instead of dealing with it
Jackson, like so many others who have experienced child trauma, had to train himself to run from pain instead of deal with it, since while experiencing it he was too young to understand how to process it. In instances like this, when traumatized youth get older, they become more aware of unresolved issues as their pain surfaces. This triggers a response with two options: get to the root cause of the pain by facing it, or run from it by medicating yourself with mind-altering substances, superficial relational encounters, entertainment, or a centering of your life on tasks and performance since it makes you feel good about yourself because of your great abilities.
The recent autopsy of Jackson showed that he had nothing in his stomach except pain-killing pills. Also, his body was filled with needle marks from shooting these drugs.
5. He constantly lived in the past to recapture what he thought he lost
Often those who have had to grow up faster than their emotional ability to cope regret the loss of their innocence and childhood. Jackson created a fantasy world with his Neverland Ranch, replete with an amusement park and a constant influx of young children so he could make up for what he couldn’t have as a child. He probably had close relationships with so many children both because of his compassion for them and also because his emotional immaturity made it difficult to relate maturely with other adults.
6. He didn’t keep close friends who held him accountable
Jackson had a close friend who was a Jewish rabbi who distanced himself from Jackson because he saw that Jackson really wasn’t taking his advice and wasn’t willing to change.
7. He lived with self-hatred
When Jackson was young he looked like a black person. As he got older his skin color and face looked whiter and whiter, to the point that he barely resembled an African-American anymore! All of that cosmetic surgery showed he was trying to be someone he was not. In the process his appearance became more and more bizarre! Perhaps the greatest pain Jackson felt was the pain of self-deprecation. For some reason, it seems like he hated himself and, especially after being accused of child molestation, he probably had a hard time really facing who he was.
Any person need to face who they are and, when confronted with our sinfulness, need to go to the cross and allow Christ’s blood to cleanse us. Ultimately, we have to accept God’s forgiveness for ourselves in spite of our momentous failures in life. No doing so will lead to our premature demise–in life, relationships, and in ministry.
Note: for a view of this tragedy from someone close to Jackson, read The Tragic End of Michael Jackson By Rabbi Shmuley Boteach
Other article by Rabbi Shmuley Boteach
http://www.jpost.com/servlet/Satellite?cid=1245924935526&pagename=JPost/JPArticle/ShowFull
